Succubus Shadows Chapter 17

My initial time with the Oneroi had been a mix of true and false ideates. As time went on and I in truthly had no way of saying how much of it did go on the majority of them seemed to be true virtuosos. They were either visitations of awful memories or more glimpses into my real life, meant to demoralize me and fetch me homesick.I was still torn apart, still feeling more animal than human or succubus orwhatever. Yet, the fleeting pieces of tenableness within me wondered at the sudden lack of handcrafted visions. One might argue the Oneroi were being lazy. They were just giving me recycled material, and whe neer I did see my friends in the human beings, I got the ideal that it was less a dream and more equal the Oneroi flipping me onto a TV channel to make sure I stayed distracted and gave them something to feed off of. It closely felt like they were trying to keep me busy becausewell, they were busy. entirely why? What had happened? What had Dante been about to tell Roman and the others? Was it fair to middling to make the Oneroi pull some of their concern from me? Or were these simply more mind games meant to leave me in turmoil?I kept hoping Id see a follow-up to what had happened with Dante, just the Oneroi had other separate of the life Id left behind to show me. Or, well, parts I hadnt left behind. Simone was still impersonating me, and the Oneroi regarded me to know.Adding insult to injury, she was helping M resumeie and Seth with the wedding. The three of them were out barroom shopping, and honestly, I was almost more surprised to find Seth there than I was Simone in her disguise. Hed pretty much kept away from the wedding provision as much as possible, using the pretense that he was no good at findings and was happy to let Maddie run things the way she wanted.I didnt discredit the first part of what he verbalize but wondered about the second. In my heart of hearts, the one that believed he was still in love with me, I on the Q.T. h oped he was passing it to Maddie just because he was indifferent to it all. I wanted to believe that he really didnt circumspection about the planning because he didnt care about the wedding.It was clear, however, that I cared. Or rather Simone cared. Considering my reluctance at dress shopping, you would pack fantasy Maddie might notice the sudden increase in zeal. Nope. Maddie was in like port caught up in her own bubble of happiness and welcomed my assistance.So, the three of them set off on a stripe adventure, visiting all the bakeries Maddie had compiled and ranked on a list pulled from hours of Internet research.You want it creamy, said Simone, licking icing off her fingers at a bakehouse in Belltown. Actually, it was more like sucking. This is a little too sugary. The threesome sat at a table where they had been provided with a plate of samples.Thats the tiptop, said Maddie. She was eating a bite-size piece of chocolate cake in a much less pornographic way. Mega suga r rush.Yeah, but if you get too much sugar, it just tastes grainy. You want it to slide right oer your lips. She turned to Seth. Dont you think so?Seth had detractn a bite out of a piece of marble cake. It is kind of grainy.Simone gave him a knowing smile, one that seemed to say, See? I know you better than anyone else in the world.Seth held her eyes for a moment, but his expression was unreadable. He turned toward Maddie. But we can do whatever you want.No, no, she said, not sounding too disappointed. This is for both of us. I want it to be something you like too.Seth gave her a mischievous smile. Does it matter? It all gets shoved in the face anyway.Maddies eyes went wide. No, it doesnt Dont even think about doing that.Guess you wont know until the time comes, huh? His smile had grown.Seeing him play with her made me (figuratively) squirm, but I took easiness in seeing a flash of annoyance in Simones eyes. Maddie was succeeding where Simone couldnt. That was how it should beor w as it? Maddies unwitting triumph over Simone meant she hadwell, triumphed over me. Or had she? Simone looked like me but wasnt truly me. Damn. This was all so confusing.Seth wouldnt do that, said Simone, resting her hand on his shoulder in what was supposed to be a couthie way. Maddie couldnt see it from her vantage, but Simones fingers lightly brushed the back of his neck. Not if he wants a good honeymoon.She spoke lightly, but there was a sly undertone there. Having her sex life brought up in public made Maddie blush. Seth had shifted uncomfortably, but the reason was unclear. Simones fingers? The mention of sex? Maybe both. Simone removed her hand, seeming vindicated to all the world, except Seth and me.Maddie seemed eager to change the subject from the romantic goings-on of a honeymoon. I think you should at least pick the cake flavor, she said. Im choosing so much else.I dont know, said Seth. He still seemed uncomfortable. I dont care if you do it.Yeah, but she wants you to, said Simone. Come on, make one firm conclusiveness here. You cant go wrong. Maddiell eat anything you pick.Loaded statement. Neither Seth nor Maddie acted as though they read anything into it, but I had a feeling Simone had intended it as a reference to Maddies very buxom figure.Exactly, said Maddie. Whats your favorite flavor?I bet I can guess, said Simone. Chocolate.Strawberry, said Maddie.Losers. It was vanilla.Vanilla, said Seth.Maddie groaned. Naturally. Well, theres one decision made. She rose from the table. Lets try a few other places and get the rest of this taken care of. Not much left after this. They reached the door, and Maddie stopped to discern at Simone. Oh, hey. Will you do me a favor? Will you take Seth tux shopping?What? asked Seth. No neutral face now. He was shocked.Maddie grinned. If you dont assimilate a keeper, youll show up at the church in a Billy Idol T-shirt. And its bad luck if I go with you.I suasion that was just for the bride, said Seth.I want to be surprised, Maddie countered.Of course Ill go, said Simone, putting her arm around Seth again in that friendly way.Maddie beamed, and the bakery faded awaytransforming into Eriks store.Erik sat at a small table with Jerome and Roman, and so help me they were drinking tea. Even Jerome. Roman was visible, which made me think Jerome mustiness have decided they no longer needed to fear the eyes of higher powers who might wonder why my human roommate kept tagging along with Seattles archdemon.Erik was tapping his tea cup thoughtfully. If your theory is right, it would explain a lot. These words were directed at Roman. The dream quality of the visions. Mr. Jeromes complete inability to find her.Jeromes slightly arc eyebrow was the all indication of his displeasure over the word inability.Erik continued, eyes on his cup as he pondered it all. And youre rightof all the creatures you suggested, Oneroi or Morphean demons make the most sense.Oh I thought in triumph to the Oneroi. How d o you like that, bitches? My friends are on to you. No response came. No dissolving of the dream, as I would have expected.But why her? asked Roman irritably. I had a feeling hed taken credit for the dream idea, shielding Dante from Jeromes wrath. Why a succubus? Dont they only care about human dreams?Theyre tied to Nyx, pointed out Erik. Oh, yes. My friends were smart. Smarter than Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys put together. Maybe even Matlock too.The why is irrelevant, said Jerome, speaking at last. Whether its Oneroi or Morpheans is in addition irrelevant. If somethings taken her to the world of dreams, shes completely inaccessible.Roman frowned. Why? Cant you just go in there and pull her out now that you know?Jerome gave his son a smile that almost, almost seemed genuinely amused. Youre half-human, and it shows. Greater immortals cant go there. We dont dream. Only gentleman do. The way is barred to us.Because you have no hopes or imaginings of what might be, said Erik. His ma nner and tone clearly indicated he believed such a thing to be a failing for angels and demons. You need a soul to dream.Well, if Im half-human, then Ill go there, said Roman obstinately, cutting off any retort Jerome might have given. I dream. So I can enter, right? And I can take on whatevers there. There was so much determination in his voice that I half believed he could take on an army of Oneroi right now.You have no idea what youre talking about, said Jerome. Clearly. Do you have any idea what the dream world is like?Do you? asked Roman dryly. I thought you couldnt go there.Dreams are what fuel human existence. Dreams of power, love, revenge, redemptionthe dreams of mankind are vast, uncountable. Humans dream both waking and asleep. Those hopes and fears are what put them at chance they gamble their waits and souls on dreams. You go into the world of dreams, and its like stepping into a blizzard. Every snowflake is some human imagining flitting by so quickly, you cant even see it. on the whole you see is a blur, a tangle of longings and chaos. If Georgina is there, she is one of those snowflakes. You would never find her soul.Heavy silence fell.Finally, Roman said, That was like poetry, Dad.But hes correct, Erik told Roman.More silence.Roman glanced between the two of them incredulously. So thats it? Its hopeless? Youre giving up without even trying to find her?Trying is hopeless, said Jerome. Demons might not dream the way humans did, but I suspected even he could picture what his superiors would do when they found out hed lost a succubus. Human magic could access the world of dreams, but itd do no good. He glanced at Erik, who nodded.Someone lost among all that couldnt be called back. Not even the strongest ritual could do it. Her soul would never hear anything we could muster.Romans face was a mixture of emotions. Anger. Disbelief. Andresignation. That didnt surprise me. Jeromes face did, however. He had stiffened at Eriks words, a spark of insigh t flashing in those cold, dark eyes.But you could do the ritual, correct? he asked Erik. Youre human. Youre strong enough to open the way.Erik eyed him warily. Yesbut by your own admission, it would achieve nothing. The connection you had to her was theoretically strong enough to possibly summon her back, but you cant enter. All wed have is a useless doorway.Jerome stood up abruptly. He glanced at Roman. Find your own way home. The demon vanished with a showy poof of smoke.And I vanished back into the Onerois prison. They stood there in the dark, glowing from what theyd taken from me. In dreams, though I suffered, I never felt the offensive effects they caused until I returned from them. That was when the agony, energy loss, and confusion hit me. Yet, this time, I wasnt completely lost to despair.You were wrong, I said. I tried to put some smugness in my voice, but it came out hoarse from my exhaustion. Good God. I was so, so tired. I guess dreaming didnt necessarily mean sleeping. My friends have figured it out. They know where I am.As always, One and Two were nearly impossible to read. What makes you think that was a true dream?Excellent question. Gut instinct, I said.You believe you can trust it? asked One. by and by all this time? After so many dreams? How can you tell whats real and unreal?I couldnt. I knew when the memories were true for now but the real world scenes were harder. Maybe it wasnt my gut so much as my blind optimism that believed what Id just seen was real.Two guessed my thoughts. You hope. And weve fed that hope, making you think you have a chance. So you will wait. And wait. And wait.It was real, I said firmly, as though that would make it so.Even if it was, said One, it meant nothing. You saw for yourself. There is no way to bring you back.Maybe that was the lie, I said. Maybe the rest was true. You mixed it. They figured out where I was, but you didnt show me the part where they learned how to rescue me. Theyre going to do that ritu al.They will fail. cypher can pull your soul from here.Youre wrong. I didnt even really know what I was saying. My essence felt like it was tearing apart, and really, the only thing I knew to do was to keep contradicting them.And you are naive. You always have been. Lesser immortals carry that impuissance over from their human days, and youre one of the worst. Our mother nearly used your weakness to free herself from the angels. Now it will be your downfall.What do you mean Nyx almost used it?The Oneroi exchanged glances very, very pleased ones. Your dream. Your fantasy, explained Two. The one she promised to show you if you freed her. You wanted so badly to believe it was possible, that you nearly gave in.For a moment, I didnt see them or that perpetual blackness. I was in a dream of my own creation, not theirs. The dream Nyx had sent to me over and over had been one of my future, with a home and a child and a man. A man I loved whose identity remained a mystery. Nyx had never s hown me the ending. Never shown me the man in the dream.You are so full of shit, I said. You claim Nyx shows the truth the future. But how could that vision have been true if Im similarly supposed to be locked here for all eternity? They cant both be true.The future is always changing, said One. That was true when she showed it to you. Your path shifted.Oh, come on Whats the point of having a vision of the future if it can change at any moment? Thats not a truth or a lie. Thats a guess. And I never believed her anyway. What she showed me was impossible even if I wasnt here with you two assholes.You will never know if it was, said Two. Then, he reconsidered. Actually it was possible, but you will live with the knowledge that its a future thats been taken from you.You cant take what I never had, I growled. Succubi cant have children. I could never have that kind of life.What I didnt add was that one startling thing had come from the dream. In it, Id had two cats. At the time, Id on ly had one Aubrey. Not long after, Id found Godiva, who was the other cat in the dream. Coincidence? Or had I truly been on the path to that future, only to have it ripped from me now? As always, the Oneroi could see into my heart and knew what I was thinking.Do you want to see? asked One.See what?The man, said Two. The man in the dream.